strideways: (Default)
dave strider ([personal profile] strideways) wrote 2011-09-15 09:34 pm (UTC)

Text;

okay first of all
youre hotter than i am gay
trust me
i wasnt gonna mince words on that one

and secondly
i am outright fucking offended that you have any doubts
this plan is watertight
fireproof
and insured against earthquakes
ground starts shaking and everyone in the strider foolproof plan center just goes about their fucking business like aint nothin goin on
the fancy aquarium in the lobby doesnt spill a damn drop
lights dont even flicker
while folks outside are running amok because it turns out fucking godzilla is causing the cracks in the pavement and the building collapses
and that motherfucker shows up and takes one look at this plan and goes
oh shit
guess id better move on
not wasting my beastly time on this endeavor
its obviously rock fucking solid
and hauls his ass back to tokyo to fight a giant moth or some shit

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